i’ve been living in the past, but i didn’t quite understand it.
i created this trap with all of my regrets and pains. it’s as if it was a burden that weighs me down. don’t get me wrong, the mistakes help me become who i am today, but i also hate myself for each and every time i screw up something meaningful to me. i feared it that it’s the end of it all. i didn’t want anything new or too different really, just achieve my handful of goals and thrive.
i can’t change the past. but i have a future to look forward to. i could end up making some more mistakes, but that’s okay. it might only get harder, but if you want something so badly, you’ll discipline yourself enough. there’s moments where i work and barely sleep to times like now where i want to let my heart out, but i need to trust time as time supported me before. the future is all you got for improvement. no need to carry any more pain from the past.